But I haven't been to Vegas for months...

me - "Hello?"
Ben (office manager) - "Hi Zac, your wife is holding on line one."
me - "My wife? I'm pretty sure it's for the other Zach."
Ben - "Oh. Yeah. Probably."

Note the "h." This is not me talking to myself

me, holding my hands in C shapes, finger tips and thumbs toward each other about half an inch apart - "Zach, what's about this size?"

Zach - "Uhhhmm..."

me - "I don't want to describe it as the size of a burger."

Zach - "I think you can say burger. A burger is pretty portable and definitely palm-sized."

me - "Well here's a picture of what I'm describing."

Zach - "That's really more like a BLT."